Angry Rant # 6

Ok kids, I can only take so much before I snap and type a ranting blog about that which hath made me snap. You all know by now that I am a big tv watcher, and by being such an avid watcher, you inevitably have to watch the dreaded commercials. Well, a few commercials these days have me quite uneasy due to their lack of logic.

Here are a few examples:

1. Suzuki - Grand Vitara

The Setup:

A guy in a business suit opens his front door and turns to kiss his wife goodbye for the day. He takes two steps before the camera pans out and we see the guy basejump down into a huge canyon or ravine or whatever those huge holes are called.

He lands feet away from his Grand Vitara, gets in and drives away.

The Problem:

The thing that bugs me about this commercial is this: If this dude's house is at the top of this canyon, and his car is at the bottom, how the hell does he get to his house when he gets home from work? He doesn't drive up there, cause his car is at the bottom!! And I'm not sure I'm ready to buy the fact that he scales the cliff face every evening.

2. US Army

The Setup:

a.) The boss walks into the airplane hangar with a new employee by his side. The new employee is a former Army man who is taking a civilian job. The boss leaves, and two other employees ask the Army man: "Have you ever worked with something so fast before?" (pointing at the airplane).

After a few moments of the Army man in military action, he looks at them and nods before very unemotionally, very smugly replying: "Yeah, in my last job." With a smirk on his face.

b.) Some friends are sitting on a porch, drinking some brewskis when an Army man, in his Army clothes walks in. The guys all cheer and welcome him in. They ask him what he does in the army, and he says he works with computers.

"Couldn't you do that here?" the friends ask.

After a few moments of action from the battlefield, the Army man says very unemotionally, very smugly: "No, not really." With a smirk on his face.

The Problem:

Couldn't the US Army tell these actors to not portray themselves as such arrogant dicks?!? My blog isn't political, so I won't comment of the war or any such thing, but I will say I wouldn't sign up if I was going to end up like these guys!! (Ed Note: the views on this blog are not necessarily the views of the writer...oh, wait, I'm the writer...never mind.)

3. White Castle

The Setup:

A lady has a freezer and a microwave in her bedroom, the freezer is stocked full of White Castle products.

The Problem:

She says she keeps the freezer in the bedroom "just in case there is another Y2K..." First of all, nothing happened on Y2K, but let's assume it did and chaos ensued. In that, worst case scenario, I'm sure the power would be out, and THE FREEZER AND MICROWAVE WOULDN'T WORK!!

Plus, like the previous White Castle commercial with the lady making Slider casserole, these actresses are just creepy. Hey freezer lady, what's with the Pale Baby Blue portraits of the kids hanging over the bed? This isn't 1940 you know!!

I'm sure there are other, but these are three have my brain boiling right now, and I better not push my brain's limits or it might just explode.