Super Bowl

I live in Indiana...

I watched the AFC Championship Game matching the Indianapolis Colts and the New England Patriots.

At first, I was afraid...I was petrified.

But, as the song goes, I will survive...because the Colts won, baby!!!

super bowl, Super Bowl, SUPER BOWL!!!

In closing, I'll leave you with the sign at our local Midas shop.



GO COLTS!!

Famous Idol Rejects

Once again, the weather has turned from warm to cold, the trees have shed their leaves, and American Idol is on television. Season Six began last night, and, once again, I found myself in front of the old boob tube watching the good, the not so good, and the down right terrible compete to become the next American Idol.

The auditions were first held in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Being a big music fan, I knew Prince was from Minneapolis, but I also knew of another great artist from the Gopher State, Bob Dylan. That got me to thinking.

While Dylan is notably one of the best songwriter's ever, he wouldn't even come close to making it past the judges, and on to Hollywood. What other famous musicians wouldn't get the Golden Ticket?

1. Bob Dylan



Randy: "Yo, Dogg...Minnesota native? Yo, represent, do it right!!"

Simon: "What song are you going to sing us?"

Dylan: "This Land is Your Land, by Woody Guthrie"

Simon: "Ok, off you go."

(10 seconds later)

Simon: "Are you being serious? That was horrendous! Paula?"

Paula: "I'm gonna pass."

Randy: "Yeah, dogg, that's a no for me, too."

Simon: "It's a no, Bob."

2. Chuck Berry



(Berry enters the room with his famous Duck Walk.)

Simon: "NEXT!!"

(Paula hits Simon.)

Randy: "Come on, Simon, give him a chance!!"

(Simon begrudgingly agrees.)

(10 seconds later...)

Simon: "Oh, that was worth it!!" (note sarcastic tone.) "NEXT!!"

3. Jimi Hendrix



(Jimi enters wearing an array of brightly colored clothing, and his signature blat hat with purple trim.)

Simon: "Where are you from?"

Hendrix: "Seattle"

Simon: "Looks like Mars..."

(Paula hits Simon.)

(Hendrix begins to sing...10 seconds later.)

Simon: "Is that considered good in Mars?"

Randy: "Yeah, dogg, it was just a'ight for me. Simon?"

Simon: "No."

Paula: "I'm sorry, it's a no for me, too."

Randy: "Yeah, dogg, it's a no."

4. John Lennon



Paula: "Says, here you are from England?"

(Lennon nods.)

Simon: "Not much of a talker, this one."

(Paula hits Simon.)

(Lennon begins to sing...15 seconds later.)

Simon: "I like you."

Randy: "Just cause he's from England!!"

Paula: "You were pitchy in spots. Simon?"

Simon: "I say yes."

Randy: "No, dogg, not for me."

Paula: "I'm on the fence...I'm gonna say no, sorry."

5. Bruce Springsteen



Randy: "Jersey, represent!! I use to lay down tracks with Journey!"

Simon: "Journey isn't from Jersey!"

Randy: "Yo, Mariah Carey, dogg!!" (NOTE: Ironically, Jackson worked with both Springsteen and Dylan...)

Simon: "Enough with this name dropping, just sing."

(10 seconds later...)

Randy: "Um...nah, it's a no."

Paula: "No."

Simon: "Sorry, Bruce, it's a no."

6. Tom Petty



Simon: "Why are you here?"

Petty: "To sing."

Simon: "Go ahead."

(3 notes later...)

Randy: (holding his ears, and laughing) "Yo, dogg, singing is not your thing!!"

Simon: "If I'm being honest, that sounded like a cat got it's bum caught in a blender!"

(Paula hits Simon.)

Simon: "Honestly, Paula, that was appalling!"

Paula: "Do you have to be so rude about it?"

(The bickering continues as Petty leaves the room.)

7. Bon Scott - AC/DC



(Bon Scott enters the room with a fifth of whiskey in his hands.)

Scott: "Back in Blaaaaaaaaack"

Simon: "SECURITY!!"

8. Joey Ramone - The Ramones

Paula: "How tall are you!?!"

Ramone: "I don't know, 6"5, 6"6..."

Simon: "Ok, enough with this chatter, go ahead and sing."

(Ramone begins to sing, and Randy and Paula quickly cover their faces and start laughing.)

Simon: "How do you think you did? You know what, forget that, you are terrible, the door is that way."

9. Ozzy Osbourne



Simon: "What are you going to sing for us today?"

Ozzy: "Um, well, sizzle furly hurgle."

(All 3 judges look puzzled.)

Randy: "I don't think I know that one, dogg."

Ozzy: "mumble, sizzle...fuckin' furly hurgle!"

Simon: "Um, go ahead."

(10 seconds later)

Randy: "Oh, In the Ghetto!!" (NOTE: Why is it that Ozzy can sing coherently, but not talk coherently??)

Ozzy: "yea, fuckin' sizzle..."

Simon: (interrupting) "I can't understand a word that you have said...it's a no."

10. Johnny Rotten - Sex Pistols



(Rotten enters the room)

Rotten: "bleep, bleep, bleep, you bleepity, bleepers!!"

(Rotten exits the room.)
---------------------------------------------

So, there you have it, 10 musicians who wouldn't get the Golden Ticket to Hollywood on American Idol. I know, I know...there are a lot of artists who are worse singers than the 10 I named (well, some of the 10 I named, anyway), but do you know what all 10 of these frontmen have in common?

I'll give you a second...

Ok, time's up...(highlight over blank spot to reveal answer) they are all members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame!! Talent isn't always singin' in key!! (NOTE: I know, Idol is a singing competition...but can you tell me how in the hell Carmen Rasmussen or Nikki McKibben made it as far as they did? I'd take two Dylans and a shot of Ozzy over either of them!!)

The Streak

Being that it is a new year, a time of resolutions that eventually get broken, I thought I would tell you a tale of a magnificent streak that spanned many months beginning back in August.

Ok, this has nothing to do with New Year's Resolutions, but if it inspires some people to make a streak of their own (possibly as a New Year's Resolution?!?), so be it.

You see, I am a not a morning person. I hate mornings, in fact. This was evident in the fact that I was perpetually late for work. I'm not talking an hour late, or even 20 minutes, but 5 minutes here, three minutes there...you get the idea.

Well, in August, (or was it July? I don't remember...not important) I decided to make a change. I decided to make it to work on time, every day! I know what you're thinking..."Big deal!!" Well, mister, it is a big deal for me...after all, if you had no boss on site, no morning responsibilities, and a love of sleeping in, it would be a big deal!!

Without further ado, here is my journey...



Day one was surprisingly easy. I had decided to make a change, and by george I was going to do it!! I was a whole 5 minutes early, and the healing process had begun!!




By day 10, I was still easily making the time. This was, however, the first time I asked my co-worker to throw me a party for my excellence in getting to work on time.

This was also the first time she said "Hell, no!!"




Note the volleyball graphic...creative, I know!! Since I have always been # 13 on all the volleyball teams I've ever played on, I think it's appropriate!



Since I loathe this number, I decided NOT to draw any tribute to it. This was also the first day that I RAN from my car to make it into the building on time. WHEW...2 minutes to spare!!



Day 50...by this time, I was in the zone! I even managed to draw a little guitar playing 50 and still make it to work on time...

This was the second time I requested a party from my co-worker...nothing special, just some cake, or a cookie...maybe a few hundred of my closest friends.

Co-Worker: "HELL, NO!! Why would I give you a party for something you should be doing anyway?"

I guess she had a point...maybe at 100, I offered.




Everything zen at day 69...



Ah, it finally arrived, day 100. I fully expected to walk in on day 100 to a showering of confetti, and signs declaring me the Greatest!! (Especially since I hinted at such for a few days prior!!)

It was not to be. I was greeted instead by an icy stare, and a "whoop-de-doo!!"

That was just wrong.



For those of you who aren't good at puzzles, this is for day 107.

Then, disaster...



You see, the night of my 107th consecutive streak day (wow, that was confusing) my alarm clock was reset...upon setting the time back, I must have set it a few minutes off from what I had it set at before. The next day, I woke up and thought nothing of the time, as it was the same time I had normally awoke (or so I thought.)

I didn't even run into work, I thought I had it...

But a quick look at the clock told a different story...8:02.

I was 2 minutes late. The streak was over.

I felt ashamed, but relieved. All that pressure to make it on time was taking it's toll on me. Mentally, I was a wreck. But, in the end, I am proud of my 107 days on time to work...I still wanted that party, though!!