If it's better to give than receive, and I give a gift to a friend of mine, am I not saying to that friend "I gave the gift, therefore I am better than you?"
I don't like telling my friends, or giving them the impression, I am better than they are, so I think it only makes sense that I only receive gifts, rather than give them...you know, I don't want to make my friends feel bad.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Friday, May 08, 2009
Mother's Day Fiasco
Hendrix will be a year old in June. Yeah, I know, it's crazy. Well, for this first Mother's Day, I wanted to get Becky something special, so I decided to get her a Mother's Day ring with my, Hendrix and her name engraved on it with our birthstones. I found that a certain store's website was advertising such a ring, so I filled out the information and ordered the ring. That was when the trouble started. (I won't mention the store's name, let's just say it rhymes with Paul Blart.)
PLEASE NOTE THE VERBIAGE ON THIS ADVERTISEMENT...
HURRY! Order BY April 26th for delivery by Mother's Day.
(Fine print reads: For Personalized Jewelry and Gifts - Excludes Photo Gifts).
APRIL 20th
On April 20th, I placed my order. One ring, names, stones, blah, blah, blah. Ok. I paid for the ring online and soon after I received a email conformation. It read, in a nutshell:
"Thank you for your purchase. Your purchase will be delivered between June 7th and June 17th."
For those of you who may not realize this, Mother's Day is May 10th this year.
My immediate instinct told me not to worry, it was probably a mistake. You know, it was a special promotion and the ring would actually be there in time. With this in mind, I wrote a nice email to the Wal...er, the Paul Blart help desk, explaining the situation and my hope the ring would arrive by Mother's Day.
I got a generic form letter...Thank you, we will get back with you in 24 hours, blah blah blah. So, I waited.
The next day, I got a call on my cell phone. It was a representative for the company. She informed me the shipping information I received was correct, and that, unfortunately, the ring I ordered had a cut off of April 18th for Mother's Day delivery. (April 18th was a Sunday, FYI...kinda fishy in my opinion.) Trying not to get irate (as Hendrix was asleep, and I didn't want to wake him) I said:
Me: "So, let me get this straight, your website advertised it would be delivered by Mother's Day, but it isn't going to happen."
Her: "Yes, sir, that's correct, you missed the cutoff for this item."
Me: "It doesn't say anything about a cutoff on the website."
Her: "I'm sorry sir. Have a nice day."
Me: "Alright, I guess."
I hung up, and shot an email to the help desk once again.
Hello...
I just wanted to send a follow up to express my extreme disappointment with the promotion on the Paul Blart website. I just spoke with a representative who informed me the ring I ordered would not be delivered by Mother's Day because the cut off for that ring was April 18th and I ordered on the 20th EVEN THOUGH the website clearly says:
Hurry! Order by April 26th for Mother's Day delivery! For Personalized Jewelry and Gifts.
No mention whatsoever about the 18th.
Now I have to explain to my wife why Paul Blart isn't getting her gift to her on time, but a month after the fact. I appreciate the follow up, but I am disappointed that the information on your website was incorrect. In the future, I WILL NOT be purchasing items from your website, or your store.
Ok, so that was a bit of an exaggeration, but I wanted to get the point across. I got another form letter email: Sorry we couldn't help, if there is anything we can do let us know, blah blah blah.
There is one thing you can do...QUIT FALSE ADVERTISING ON YOUR WEBSITE!!
I started my search for the corporate headquarters phone number, but quickly got sidetracked as often I do. I told Becky, roundaboutly, the situation and explained the gift wouldn't be there until much later than I wanted. I began looking for alternatives for the special day, and gave up the search for the corporate number.
But there is a happy ending to this story. Wednesday, May 6th I opened my front door to find a package. It was the ring!! Don't know if my voice was heard, if the customer service person was out of the loop, or what, but the ring arrived, all the names were spelled correctly, and the stones were in place.
Because we never wait, I gave Becky the ring and the alternative give (a full massage gift certificate...no, I'm not giving the massage, a professional is!!) and she loved the ring very much! It sparkles on her finger, and I know she appreciates it.
Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's out there!!
PLEASE NOTE THE VERBIAGE ON THIS ADVERTISEMENT...
HURRY! Order BY April 26th for delivery by Mother's Day.
(Fine print reads: For Personalized Jewelry and Gifts - Excludes Photo Gifts).
APRIL 20th
On April 20th, I placed my order. One ring, names, stones, blah, blah, blah. Ok. I paid for the ring online and soon after I received a email conformation. It read, in a nutshell:
"Thank you for your purchase. Your purchase will be delivered between June 7th and June 17th."
For those of you who may not realize this, Mother's Day is May 10th this year.
My immediate instinct told me not to worry, it was probably a mistake. You know, it was a special promotion and the ring would actually be there in time. With this in mind, I wrote a nice email to the Wal...er, the Paul Blart help desk, explaining the situation and my hope the ring would arrive by Mother's Day.
I got a generic form letter...Thank you, we will get back with you in 24 hours, blah blah blah. So, I waited.
The next day, I got a call on my cell phone. It was a representative for the company. She informed me the shipping information I received was correct, and that, unfortunately, the ring I ordered had a cut off of April 18th for Mother's Day delivery. (April 18th was a Sunday, FYI...kinda fishy in my opinion.) Trying not to get irate (as Hendrix was asleep, and I didn't want to wake him) I said:
Me: "So, let me get this straight, your website advertised it would be delivered by Mother's Day, but it isn't going to happen."
Her: "Yes, sir, that's correct, you missed the cutoff for this item."
Me: "It doesn't say anything about a cutoff on the website."
Her: "I'm sorry sir. Have a nice day."
Me: "Alright, I guess."
I hung up, and shot an email to the help desk once again.
Hello...
I just wanted to send a follow up to express my extreme disappointment with the promotion on the Paul Blart website. I just spoke with a representative who informed me the ring I ordered would not be delivered by Mother's Day because the cut off for that ring was April 18th and I ordered on the 20th EVEN THOUGH the website clearly says:
Hurry! Order by April 26th for Mother's Day delivery! For Personalized Jewelry and Gifts.
No mention whatsoever about the 18th.
Now I have to explain to my wife why Paul Blart isn't getting her gift to her on time, but a month after the fact. I appreciate the follow up, but I am disappointed that the information on your website was incorrect. In the future, I WILL NOT be purchasing items from your website, or your store.
Ok, so that was a bit of an exaggeration, but I wanted to get the point across. I got another form letter email: Sorry we couldn't help, if there is anything we can do let us know, blah blah blah.
There is one thing you can do...QUIT FALSE ADVERTISING ON YOUR WEBSITE!!
I started my search for the corporate headquarters phone number, but quickly got sidetracked as often I do. I told Becky, roundaboutly, the situation and explained the gift wouldn't be there until much later than I wanted. I began looking for alternatives for the special day, and gave up the search for the corporate number.
But there is a happy ending to this story. Wednesday, May 6th I opened my front door to find a package. It was the ring!! Don't know if my voice was heard, if the customer service person was out of the loop, or what, but the ring arrived, all the names were spelled correctly, and the stones were in place.
Because we never wait, I gave Becky the ring and the alternative give (a full massage gift certificate...no, I'm not giving the massage, a professional is!!) and she loved the ring very much! It sparkles on her finger, and I know she appreciates it.
Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's out there!!
More Odd Mail
Back on March 17th, I asked you good readers what my mail was trying to tell me. You see, I received a coupon and flyer encouraging me to get some Depends adult diapers. Well, the mail has gotten worse! Here is my recent mail...
First, I get this wonderful invitation to be one of 17 people to test out the newest hearing aids! What? Oh, sorry, I thought you said something...guess my hearing is just bad.
Then, I get this...
Yes, folks, this is a Senior Update card telling me if I fill it out and join, I can get 100% of my funeral paid! FUNERAL?!? I hope this is premature, but dang with the Depends, the Hearing Aid and now the funeral talk, I wonder if this is all a sign...or maybe I just got on some old people mailing list!
Well, Matlock is coming on, I gotta go!
First, I get this wonderful invitation to be one of 17 people to test out the newest hearing aids! What? Oh, sorry, I thought you said something...guess my hearing is just bad.
Then, I get this...
Yes, folks, this is a Senior Update card telling me if I fill it out and join, I can get 100% of my funeral paid! FUNERAL?!? I hope this is premature, but dang with the Depends, the Hearing Aid and now the funeral talk, I wonder if this is all a sign...or maybe I just got on some old people mailing list!
Well, Matlock is coming on, I gotta go!
Monday, April 06, 2009
Denny's 2 Pound Challenge!!!
Date: April 4, 2009
Time: 4:45 pm
Place: Denny's Beer Barrel Pub - Clearfield, PA
Mission: Complete the monster 2 pound Denny's Pub challenge in under one hour.
The challenger:
(Me)
The 2 pound Opponent:
(Check the size next to the water bottle!)
Now check it next to my head!
(my buddy, Dan, also tried the challenge!!)
Ok, here are the stats on this burger, so you know what I was dealing with:
Burger: 2 pounds
Cheese: 5 slices
Bun: More than I thought
Mayo: Slathered on the top bun
Onion: Half an onion at least.
Tomato: Full tomato at least.
Banana Peppers: A bunch
Lettuce: 5 large leafs. (or should it be leaves? Anyone?)
And a mystery ingredient that I will name later.
The top bun, I would say, was probably the same thickness as the burger, which was a good 2 inches at least.
I had a strategy going in, based on the trial run I did (check the archives if you want to read that story.) My plan was simple:
1. Deconstruct the burger immediately so the mayo wouldn't contaminate the rest of the burger. This was due to my inability to eat the mayo in the trial run, thus causing me to gag.
2. Eat the mayo bun first, so it was gone.
3. Eat the veggies...the tomato, onion, banana peppers, lettuce. A salad, if you will, before the main course.
4. Chow on burger, bun, burger, bun...
5. Finish and lapse into a burger induced coma.
I deconstructed and went to work.
(My three piles...bun, toppings, burger. NOTE: the fries in the foreground were not mine...my buddy, Dan ordered them...he was cocky.)
(They wouldn't give me a fork, but they didn't say I couldn't use the pickle's spear to help me!!)
As I went to work on the lettuce. I was shocked to find under it a mystery ingredient...relish. I HATE relish! I took the first little bite and gagged...I would have to get creative. Dan recommended mixing it with a bite of other stuff. It worked!!
But, as you can see from the next photo, I began slipping into the burger induced coma a little early!
I shook it off and soldiered on.
I was slowing down with 20 minutes left on the clock...
...but I knew the end was near. With 10 minutes left, I knew the dream was over. I never gave up, but I knew I would never make it in an hour. Just for the record, I don't think I would have made it period. I was just about over eating hamburger, and bun. Maybe in an hour and a half...maybe not.
(Defeated...)
(Thumbs down...)
Like with the trial run, I still had about 1/2 pound to go on the burger...
...but I still had the entire bottom bun.
Defeated, I ordered a shot (cause I wanted the shot glass for a souvenir) and slammed down the fire water...bleeech!
And then we left...no fanfare, no name on the plaque, just two ordinary Joe's stuffed and defeated by the 2 lb. Denny's challenge.
In case you were wondering, here's how my buddy, Dan, finished...
He ate all the burger, but little of the bun or toppings. Oh, and a bunch of fries!
Over all it was a great little trip...special thanks to Dan for everything! Especially the great company and putting himself in misery to try the challenge with me. Thanks, Dan!!
And to all of you readers...sorry, I let you down!!
Time: 4:45 pm
Place: Denny's Beer Barrel Pub - Clearfield, PA
Mission: Complete the monster 2 pound Denny's Pub challenge in under one hour.
The challenger:
(Me)
The 2 pound Opponent:
(Check the size next to the water bottle!)
Now check it next to my head!
(my buddy, Dan, also tried the challenge!!)
Ok, here are the stats on this burger, so you know what I was dealing with:
Burger: 2 pounds
Cheese: 5 slices
Bun: More than I thought
Mayo: Slathered on the top bun
Onion: Half an onion at least.
Tomato: Full tomato at least.
Banana Peppers: A bunch
Lettuce: 5 large leafs. (or should it be leaves? Anyone?)
And a mystery ingredient that I will name later.
The top bun, I would say, was probably the same thickness as the burger, which was a good 2 inches at least.
I had a strategy going in, based on the trial run I did (check the archives if you want to read that story.) My plan was simple:
1. Deconstruct the burger immediately so the mayo wouldn't contaminate the rest of the burger. This was due to my inability to eat the mayo in the trial run, thus causing me to gag.
2. Eat the mayo bun first, so it was gone.
3. Eat the veggies...the tomato, onion, banana peppers, lettuce. A salad, if you will, before the main course.
4. Chow on burger, bun, burger, bun...
5. Finish and lapse into a burger induced coma.
I deconstructed and went to work.
(My three piles...bun, toppings, burger. NOTE: the fries in the foreground were not mine...my buddy, Dan ordered them...he was cocky.)
(They wouldn't give me a fork, but they didn't say I couldn't use the pickle's spear to help me!!)
As I went to work on the lettuce. I was shocked to find under it a mystery ingredient...relish. I HATE relish! I took the first little bite and gagged...I would have to get creative. Dan recommended mixing it with a bite of other stuff. It worked!!
But, as you can see from the next photo, I began slipping into the burger induced coma a little early!
I shook it off and soldiered on.
I was slowing down with 20 minutes left on the clock...
...but I knew the end was near. With 10 minutes left, I knew the dream was over. I never gave up, but I knew I would never make it in an hour. Just for the record, I don't think I would have made it period. I was just about over eating hamburger, and bun. Maybe in an hour and a half...maybe not.
(Defeated...)
(Thumbs down...)
Like with the trial run, I still had about 1/2 pound to go on the burger...
...but I still had the entire bottom bun.
Defeated, I ordered a shot (cause I wanted the shot glass for a souvenir) and slammed down the fire water...bleeech!
And then we left...no fanfare, no name on the plaque, just two ordinary Joe's stuffed and defeated by the 2 lb. Denny's challenge.
In case you were wondering, here's how my buddy, Dan, finished...
He ate all the burger, but little of the bun or toppings. Oh, and a bunch of fries!
Over all it was a great little trip...special thanks to Dan for everything! Especially the great company and putting himself in misery to try the challenge with me. Thanks, Dan!!
And to all of you readers...sorry, I let you down!!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Denny's Trip Update
******************UPDATE********************
The trip to Denny's Beer Barrel Pub is on schedule for Saturday, April 4th. I will be attempting the giant two pound burger. Please comment any words of advice or encouragement that I can take with me on my journey...I will bring back tales of the monster, photos and hopefully the tee shirt that comes with slaying the monster!!
Wish me luck!!
The trip to Denny's Beer Barrel Pub is on schedule for Saturday, April 4th. I will be attempting the giant two pound burger. Please comment any words of advice or encouragement that I can take with me on my journey...I will bring back tales of the monster, photos and hopefully the tee shirt that comes with slaying the monster!!
Wish me luck!!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Happy St Patrick's Day!!
HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!
(Downtown Indy - Green Canal)
Those who know me know I love this holiday. We Gillespie's really embrace our Irish roots. I decided Hendrix should share in my enthusiasm, so I dressed him in his first St Patty's Day outfit and snapped some photos.
Enjoy!!
(Big St Patty's Day cheeser!)
(Sitting still for once!)
(Isn't he cute??)
(Coming at ya!! He was standing and fell right as I was taking the photo!!)
Ok, now go drink something green!!
(Downtown Indy - Green Canal)
Those who know me know I love this holiday. We Gillespie's really embrace our Irish roots. I decided Hendrix should share in my enthusiasm, so I dressed him in his first St Patty's Day outfit and snapped some photos.
Enjoy!!
(Big St Patty's Day cheeser!)
(Sitting still for once!)
(Isn't he cute??)
(Coming at ya!! He was standing and fell right as I was taking the photo!!)
Ok, now go drink something green!!
What is my Mail Trying to Tell Me??
My birthday isn't until April, but already I'm feeling old. Why you might ask? Well, it's because of some disturbing mail I received today.
Either I AM getting old, or someone is playing a cruel, cruel joke on me!
(click photo to enlarge)
Yes, that's right, sonny, I got an invite to get me some Depend adult diapers. Note the $2 off coupon!! BONUS!!
And, in case I wasn't sold on buying some of these, here is a nice incentive!!
Either I AM getting old, or someone is playing a cruel, cruel joke on me!
(click photo to enlarge)
Yes, that's right, sonny, I got an invite to get me some Depend adult diapers. Note the $2 off coupon!! BONUS!!
And, in case I wasn't sold on buying some of these, here is a nice incentive!!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
An Alien Invasion!
The clock had just rolled over to 3:30 am. The morning found me outstretched on the couch with Hendrix carefully perched on my chest. The street light from across the road peeked through the window. The normally busy road was calm.
Suddenly, the white light shifted to an intense red, accented by a pulsing yellow. The white street light was engulfed in darkness as an image moved into view. The blinds obscured my view, but I was sure the large object with the glowing red and yellow light could only be one thing.
A UFO!
Panic began to set in as I pulled my arm around Hendrix, as if I could protect him from the impending alien invasion. Why did they choose Indiana? Why Columbus? Why my house?!?
My mind began to race with thoughts of what was in store for me. Maybe they would abduct me? Blow me up? Mind probe? ANAL PROBE?!? Fear...the thought of pain...the thought of the unknown...
Then, the light began to swirl again, and within seconds, it was gone. I was spared!! The UFO had passed me by.
Wait a minute, I think it was just the Garbage truck picking up my trash. Yeah, that was it, never mind.
Suddenly, the white light shifted to an intense red, accented by a pulsing yellow. The white street light was engulfed in darkness as an image moved into view. The blinds obscured my view, but I was sure the large object with the glowing red and yellow light could only be one thing.
A UFO!
Panic began to set in as I pulled my arm around Hendrix, as if I could protect him from the impending alien invasion. Why did they choose Indiana? Why Columbus? Why my house?!?
My mind began to race with thoughts of what was in store for me. Maybe they would abduct me? Blow me up? Mind probe? ANAL PROBE?!? Fear...the thought of pain...the thought of the unknown...
Then, the light began to swirl again, and within seconds, it was gone. I was spared!! The UFO had passed me by.
Wait a minute, I think it was just the Garbage truck picking up my trash. Yeah, that was it, never mind.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
UPDATE: Burger Trip
With the Big Burger Trip only days away, I called my "burger buddy," Dan, and worked on finalizing the plans.
Me: "You ready to kick some big burger butt!!"
Dan: "Yeah...kinda, I have this bad cough, I'm going to the doctor to get it checked out."
Me: "Crap...well, let me know what you find out."
A few hours later:
Dan: "Dude, just found out my cough is pneumonia."
Me: "Double crap!"
Dan: "I have some meds, I should be fine by Saturday, though."
A few hours later:
Dan: "My prescriptions are $200..."
Me: "Let's just pontpone."
Dan: "Yeah, that sounds like the best plan.
So, it looks like I will try and conquer the two pounder the first weekend in April. Two more months of preperation...that 2 pounder will be conquered!!
Me: "You ready to kick some big burger butt!!"
Dan: "Yeah...kinda, I have this bad cough, I'm going to the doctor to get it checked out."
Me: "Crap...well, let me know what you find out."
A few hours later:
Dan: "Dude, just found out my cough is pneumonia."
Me: "Double crap!"
Dan: "I have some meds, I should be fine by Saturday, though."
A few hours later:
Dan: "My prescriptions are $200..."
Me: "Let's just pontpone."
Dan: "Yeah, that sounds like the best plan.
So, it looks like I will try and conquer the two pounder the first weekend in April. Two more months of preperation...that 2 pounder will be conquered!!
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Round One: Tony vs the Two Pound Burger Trial Run
The challenge was set...2 lbs of hamburger, 8 hamburger buns, one tomato, half a head of lettuce, 6 slices of cheese and a 1/4 cup each of ketchup, mustard and mayo.
All of this in one hour.
I know what some of you are thinking..."oh, that's easy, I could do that no problem!!" But consider this: this burger is the equivilent to eating 8 Quarter Pounders from McDonalds. (that's eight Royales with cheese, for my European friends...)
EIGHT!
This is no easy task.
(click any photo to enlarge.)
(The goods.)
(One 2 lb. burger patty.)
(The burger cooks.)
(The burger goes on the fixins.)
(Add the cheese...)
(...and the buns...)
(Enter the challenger!)
(One hour time limit.)
(I'm ready to chow down!!)
(5 minutes in...)
(Still looking good.)
(10 minutes down...)
(Oh, I got this!!)
(Looks like I'm about half way through. It is at this point I realize I should have paced myself a little better. I tore through the first half, but I was definitely slowing down.)
(15 minutes in...)
(Iffy at best.)
(20 minutes in...)
(Ugh...I really hit the wall at this point.)
(25 minutes in...)
(It's not looking good.)
(The half way point.)
(At this point, I was gaging...not because I was full, not because of the bread...it was partially the burger, but mostly the condiments. The mayo was making me cringe!!)
(35 minutes in...)
(I could tell at this point that another bite of burger would be impossible. The burger and condiments were killing me.)
(I ate the last bun, and prepared to throw in the towel.)
(40 minutes in...)
(That's it...it's all over!!)
(Put a fork in me...I'm done.
(I'm throwing in the towel.)
(I finished choking down the last bun top.)
(I had one and a half bottom buns, and a little less than half pound of burger left.)
(The challenger had been defeated!!)
Before I ate, we made predictions on the outcome of the challenge.
(Hendrix wrote this note...awe, isn't he sweet, he loves his daddy no matter what happens! Yes, that's what it says...I'm his dad, I know!!)
(I predicted domination...I was wrong.)
(Becky was right, she knew I could not defeat the 2 pounder.)
Overall, I learned a lot. Pace myself more, maybe eat more burger and less buns first, as the buns were easy to eat at the end. And above all, hope like crazy the mayo isn't as thick at Denny's Beer Barrel Pub!
The trip is February 21st...I will post my results soon thereafter!!
All of this in one hour.
I know what some of you are thinking..."oh, that's easy, I could do that no problem!!" But consider this: this burger is the equivilent to eating 8 Quarter Pounders from McDonalds. (that's eight Royales with cheese, for my European friends...)
EIGHT!
This is no easy task.
(click any photo to enlarge.)
(The goods.)
(One 2 lb. burger patty.)
(The burger cooks.)
(The burger goes on the fixins.)
(Add the cheese...)
(...and the buns...)
(Enter the challenger!)
(One hour time limit.)
(I'm ready to chow down!!)
(5 minutes in...)
(Still looking good.)
(10 minutes down...)
(Oh, I got this!!)
(Looks like I'm about half way through. It is at this point I realize I should have paced myself a little better. I tore through the first half, but I was definitely slowing down.)
(15 minutes in...)
(Iffy at best.)
(20 minutes in...)
(Ugh...I really hit the wall at this point.)
(25 minutes in...)
(It's not looking good.)
(The half way point.)
(At this point, I was gaging...not because I was full, not because of the bread...it was partially the burger, but mostly the condiments. The mayo was making me cringe!!)
(35 minutes in...)
(I could tell at this point that another bite of burger would be impossible. The burger and condiments were killing me.)
(I ate the last bun, and prepared to throw in the towel.)
(40 minutes in...)
(That's it...it's all over!!)
(Put a fork in me...I'm done.
(I'm throwing in the towel.)
(I finished choking down the last bun top.)
(I had one and a half bottom buns, and a little less than half pound of burger left.)
(The challenger had been defeated!!)
Before I ate, we made predictions on the outcome of the challenge.
(Hendrix wrote this note...awe, isn't he sweet, he loves his daddy no matter what happens! Yes, that's what it says...I'm his dad, I know!!)
(I predicted domination...I was wrong.)
(Becky was right, she knew I could not defeat the 2 pounder.)
Overall, I learned a lot. Pace myself more, maybe eat more burger and less buns first, as the buns were easy to eat at the end. And above all, hope like crazy the mayo isn't as thick at Denny's Beer Barrel Pub!
The trip is February 21st...I will post my results soon thereafter!!
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