BONDING

Bonding.

No, not bondage, you sicko!! Bonding...something so easy to accomplish, but yet, so hard to find time to do. This past Saturday, Becky, my brother (Andy) and I made the time for some Grade A bonding.

We started with some golf at Par 3 (where I shot a 72 to follow up my impressive 69 a few day before.) After we finished golfing, we ate some lunch and tried to figure out what we were going to do in the afternoon.

"We could go bowling." I suggested, even though I've only been bowling once in the past year...or two. The idea was quickly shot down. I pleaded for any other suggestions, when Andy finally spoke up.

"Let's go get tattoos!!" I slumped in the chair, knowing that wasn't going to happen, when something strange occurred...Becky said she was in.

I shook my head in definance. No way was I going to go to a tattoo place, or get myself poked a thousand times by a needle. No thanks. But they were persistant. Andy really wanted a tattoo with his youngest child's initial (as he has the rest of the kid's already) and Becky said she had wanted one for a long time.

I agreed to go, but not to get the ink. They smiled and bounced out the door as I drug myself from the chair to join them.

We went to three different places before ending up back at the first place we visited. Becky was up first. She chose the Japanese Kanji symbol for "peace" to go square on the top of her wrist, with some tribal bands coming from each side around her wrist, like a bracelet. The prep took a half hour, but the tat was inked out in about 10 minutes.

I have to admit, it looks pretty darn cool. I wouldn't have chosen the wrist to put it, but whatever. Andy was next. He picked his poison, a large tribal looking tattoo to go above his previous one on his right arm...a "C" in the middle. For those of you not in the know, his son's name is Chandler. Before the art began, the tattoo guy had to run a quick errand.

While we waited, Becky and Andy began the attack.

"Come on, Tony, you know you need to get one!!"
"Yeah, mine didn't hurt at all, you wuss!!"

I did see an appealing image, a shamrock with the green, white and orange of Ireland's flag in the center that I considered getting...their encouragment convinved me. I had one reservation. The price. I told them, if he wouldn't do it for $xxx, then I was out. Thinking there was no way he would go so low, I thought I would be spared.

I was in.

The tattoo artist returned, and I asked him quickly how much the shamrock would cost, hoping to go ahead and crush the promise I made to Andy and Becky.

Wouldn't you know it...without me reveiling my price, he named it. I couldn't back out now.

Andy was ready for his ink, but the guy announced he had to leave on some family emergency. He promised to knock $25 off the already cheap tattoo if Andy would return the next day. Andy, of course agreed.

Too bad I had promised to play golf with Dad and the guys Sunday...looks like I was saved at the zero hour!! Andy and Becky tried to get me to cancel, but I couldn't...or wouldn't.

They returned Sunday and Andy got his tat. They told the guy I would be back in to get mine, and I really think I will follow through. I don't think I could break the promise I made to them, in our moment of bonding. I'll update you, and let you know...maybe I will get some pictures up here, too.

Last Train to Clarksville

Thursday, DAY 4:

After my big win, I decided to find some place to spend my windfall Thursday. I found an Antique place in Clarksville...or was it Clarkville? Ah, potato...po-tot-o.

Anyhoo, I dropped Becky at work, and headed the 11 miles to Clarksville. The town, once again, was small, and besides a nice looking sit down restaurant and the Antique center, the town had nothing to offer. I pulled into the drive at the Antique center and...you guessed it, OPEN AT 10.

It was 8:30.

Ugh.

I continued down the road, through the small towns of Missouri, encountering nothing but an occasional grain silo, or beat up pick up truck (reminded me of home, actually...ha ha) I drove for about a half hour, and found a Dollar General Store. Of course, it was 8:50, and the store opened at 9 (at least it wasn't 10 like every place else!!) At 9, I finally went in to kill some time.

By 9:06 I was back on the road. It seems the Dollar General doesn't have much in the way of time killers. Plus, everyone was looking at me kinda strange. I was, after all, the only non-overall wearing person in the store.

I took a loop around Clarksville that ate the rest of the time up. Was it worth my wait? Not really. I found a few records (one nice Beatles "She Loves You" on Swan...which I bought.) Overall, I'm glad I went, but could have took it or left it. I met up with Becky for some lunch, and went back to the hotel.

Friday, DAY 5:

Becky drove herself to work, and I packed up the hotel room. She only worked until 10:30, so we had the day free. We went to Sawyers Creek and hit the mini-golf course. I was determined to beat her...but, as usual, she took me to school.

Damn non-regulation courses. I swear the greens sloped!!

We hit the road, Indiana bound. It was a nice week. Hot, but nice. It's always good to get away from work, even if your destination is the small towns of Missouri.

High Roller

Wednesday, DAY 3:

When I was at the grocery store Tuesday, I bought a lottery ticket and won $10. Then I went to the hotel and bought a Coke...the cap reveiled I had won a free 2 litter. My luck was good, so Wednesday, I deceided to throw caution to the wind, and drive 90 miles to Terrible's Mark Twain Casino in La Grange, MO.

I'm not a big gambler, but I do enjoy the occasional riverboat excursion. Apparently, gaming is legal in The Big MO, so there was no boat involved. Just walk in, and give them your money. Easy.

I sat at the video poker machine with $100, my allowance for gambling. I was doing ok. Whenever I won a sizable amount, I would cash out the ticket, and put in in my pocket. I was down to my last playable $20, and I had $110 in tickets in my pocket, so I knew I was going back with a little more than I came with. I sat down at the poor man's machine...the Nickel Video Poker, for some Three-Hand Deuces are Wild Poker. 15 credits at a time (.75 cents) with a progressive Jackpot running for a Natural (no pairs) Royal Flush.

I played for awhile...winning some, losing some. I was almost busted, when I was dealt the 10, Jack, Queen, and King of Spades. Four cards to the natual royal!! My pulse quickened.

I held the four, took a breath, and crossed my fingers...my toes...my legs...and my eyes. I hit the deal button.

The first hand popped up a Deuce. ROYAL FLUSH!! Unfortunately, it wasn't natural, so the pay out was 125 coins ($6.25). The second hand popped up the ACE OF SPADES!!! The screen flashed JACKPOT!! I couldn't believe it, I hit the jackpot!! Payout...4800 coins...$240 DOLLARS!! Sweet baby Jesus, $240 !!

The third hand popped up, but I don't know what that card ended up being, and who cared?!? I had won $240 bucks. So, I cashed out, took the tickets to the window and made off with my $350 in cold hard cash. ($250 total winnings...I started with $100, remember?)

I slapped on my new Terrible's Mark Twain Casino hat that I got free for being such a high roller (ok, they gave it to me at the door for being new to the casino, so what?) and I treated Becky to a nice dinner at the Lighthouse restaurant overlooking the Mississippi River.

...to be continued...

Missouri is for Late Sleepers

When you work hard for a living, the greatest time of year is vacation time. Even though I don't work hard, I also enjoy vacation. I hope you didn't miss me too much...

...you didn't notice did you?

Anyway, Becky and I whisked ourselves to the lush tropical landscape of far off Missouri!! Ah, yes, Missouri. What do you mean Missouri isn't lush? Not tropical, either? I bet you're wondering why we would choose Missouri. Well, it chose us, actually. Becky had to go there for work, so, since the hotel, gas, and her food were all paid for, it seemed like the perfect cheap vacation. So, off we went.

Monday, DAY 1:

I dropped Becky off at work and set off for Hannibal, MO to do a wee bit'o Antique shopping (ok, record shopping). I arrived at 9:00 ish, but alas, the antique store didn't open until 10. For those of you not in the know, Hannibal is small...and there aren't a lot of things to do there, so I deceided to tour Mark Twain's boyhood home.

I've never been a Mark Twain fan, too hard to read the dialect, but I'm always thirsty for some knowledge, so I went. It was really rather informative and neat. Who knew Mark Twain was so witty? You did? Well, sorry Einstein, I guess I'm not as smart as you are!!

When I finished there, the Antique place was opened. I found a bag full of records, and made my way around town to a couple of other places, ate a bite at Sonic, and returned to the hotel. My plan was thus...

1. Hook up the X Box
2. Play the X Box
3. Pick up Becky at 5.

Damn, it's hard to hook up an X Box to a hotel TV, especially when you're in a town the size of my car. After a good hour, I finally got it hooked up, played a few games, and had to leave.

Tuesday, DAY 2:

The plan for day 2 was simple enough. Drop Becky at work, pick up Cokes and rent a game...X Box all day long. (Like I said, the town was small, and I wanted to pace myself.)

I grabbed the cokes and headed for the rental store.

OPEN AT 10:00

"What the...what's wrong with this part of Missouri?!? Can't open anything before 10?" I looked down at the clock...9:02. Shit.

So, I drove down the road a bit, and found a pawn shop. I stopped in, looked at the CD's...picked out Simon and Garfunkel's Greatest Hits. Cool. Talked to the counter help a bit...then found the XBox game I wanted to rent in the case for $10. Screw you 10 o'clock opening rental store, I'll just buy the game!! So, after waiting another half hour while some whiny ass customer tried, in vain, to pawn a car stereo for $300 (are you kidding me?) I was able to check out, and return to the room...


...to be continued...

Musings on the 10 Year Reunion

Ten years happens in the blink of an eye, sometimes. While a lot has happened, it seems like yesterday I was walking down the hallways at GCHS, nodding hello to my fellow Class of '95.

Saturday was my 10 year class reunion, and, of course, I couldn't miss it. Who would show up, and who wouldn't? The answer was more surprising than I thought. Half the faces were of people I expected to see, and half, those I never would have guessed in a million years would attend. A couple people looked exactly the same, while some had changed so much, I couldn't recognize them.

Ten years erased all the games. The snobby were now just happy to see a familiar face. The playing field was, for once, leveled (for the most part.) It wasn't about who had "escaped the 'Burg," it was about the Class of '95, as one.

I eagerly made my rounds, trying, almost succesfully, to say hello to everyone who attended. It was important to me. While I was but a speck on the Class of '95 map, these people were in my soul. I enjoyed my short conversation with everyone, and missed the people who didn't make the trip. At the end of the night, I collected only one phone number, and made a promise to keep in touch with all of 3 people of the 40 or so classmates that were there.

You're thinking it's because the others meant nothing? That's not true. I would entertain a dinner or gathering with any of those who attended. I genuinely enjoyed the company.

I made a point to say goodbye to every guy with a handshake, and every girl with a hug...as if it were the last time we would ever meet. Maybe it will be. I hope not, but who knows, really? I tried to slip my e-mail address to everyone there, along with this website address. I hope everyone stops by, but realistically, they probably won't.

It's ok.

If by some chance you are reading this Class of '95...thank you for including me into your lives. Drop me an e-mail, and I'll save your address so we can really keep in touch. I had a wonderful time, and I sincerely hope this isn't the last time we exchange words.

Kids and Their Candy

What's the deal with Butterscotch? I don't recall any scotch in that particular candy, do you? No butter for that matter, either. What a gip!

Root Beer is 100% BEER free. And we sell that to kids? "Here, Johnny, have a Root Beer and some Candy Cigarettes...you like the hard stuff, eh? Then go ask Grandpa for some butterscotch!!"

All The Groom's Men

There is an alarming trend happening these days...

Why is it, more and more, when you go to a wedding, you see the Groom has the Bride's family as one or more of his groomsmen, or the Bride has a few sister's of the groom as Bridesmaids? I don't understand this practice, nor can I accept it.

Are you to have me believe that Mr. Groom cannot find 3 to 6 (or so) male friends that will stand up and validate his choice of soulmate? I know after the ceremony there are 5 gabillion male friends of said Mr. Groom who agree with the choice of alcohol he has chosen for the reception...but oh, no...they didn't stand up and vouche for their "friend."

It's alarming (did I already say that?)

Now, don't get me wrong, there are always exceptions. Mr Groom and Bride's brother were great friends before the bride/groom met...or groom's sister introduced the two...or whatever, but for the most part, I just don't see the logic.

How many people out there, who are married, actually had the chance to form a friendship with the bride's brother(s) in the time they courted their wives-to-be, that would hold stronger than the bond they had with their childhood friend...their own brother(s)...their dad...their work buddies...the guy who cuts their hair...whoever that they had known for YEARS.

Not many.

To each his own, I guess, but I just don't dig it.

Frees, You Scumbag!!

I was just sending out an e-mail and I asked the receipient to let me know if his schedule "frees up" later in the week.

Frees? That can't be right...is that a word? How about "freed"? That doesn't look right, either.

So, I looked them both up. Lo and behold they are BOTH actually words.

i.e. -- "Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves." and "If something frees up, let me know."

Huh, you learn something new everyday, I guess. Oh, FYI...freeing is also a word.

That is all...now go lay on the couch and turn the Britney Spears reality show on you nerds!!

Buy This Album

I've tried, purposely, not to hawk products on this blog. I don't want to tell you how you should be watching a certain movie, or drinking a certain soda...however, I would be remiss, if I did not try to get you to listen to, buy, and love the new CD by the White Stripes.


Get Behind Me Satan

I picked up my first White Stripes album in the days when "Seven Nations Army" was big on the radio. I heard it a few times and thought, "this band is pretty catchy."

Then I heard it was 2 people making those sounds. I was still skeptical, because with editing these days, you can make a whole album by yourself.

(Ed. Note: For some great albums done solely by one person...check out:

1. McCartney - Paul McCartney
2. Foo Fighters - Foo Fighters
3. Songs in the Key of Life - Stevie Wonder
4. Broken - Nine Inch Nails (Trent Reznor)
...etc, etc, etc...)

Anyway, I didn't think much of it, until I saw them perform on the MTV Music Awards. There they were, 2 people, blasting out Seven Nations Army...damn, impressive. To add to the awe, they broke into Son House's Death Letter mid song!! I had to listen to this band.

I bought White Blood Cells (the band's 3rd album from 2001). "Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground," and "Fell in Love With a Girl," were on the radio, but the way they touched different styles of music in a new fresh way...like "Hotel Yorba"s country feel, and the old style guitar sound of "I Think I Smell a Rat," and the ease of the high pitched singing in "The Same Boy You've Always Known."

How could they top that? I ran out and bought the rest of their albums the next day.

Buy them all.

1999's Self Titled - White Stripes (with a better-than-the-original cover of Dylan's One More Cup of Coffee ...and that's coming from a big Dylan fan!! - and the amazing, AMAZING St. James Infirmary, amoung a great album)

2000's De Stijl - You're Pretty Good Looking For a Girl, Apple Blossom and Death Letter are 3 of a flawless album

2001's White Blood Cells - See Above

2003's Elephant - Seven Nation's Army, I Want to be the Boy That Wins Your Mother's Heart, Hardest Button to Button, and the incredible new blues sound of Ball and Biscuit.

and now...Get Behind Me Satan.

BRILLIANT!! BUY IT!! NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!

Movin' On Up

Seems like only yesterday I was in front of all my friends at my birthday party last year, singing, strumming, and having a great old time donning the wig for "Hey Ya!"

Yesterday, the wig came back out.

We just moved into a new building at work (our third in 5 years...man, I get bounced around like a red-headed step-child!) and the old tenants decided to throw a block party to welcome us newbies aboard.

Catered lunch, door prizes, and getting to know you presentations.

"Be Creative!!" the signs screamed. "Top prize wins a great reward!!" Oh, yeah.

So, I cooked up a little song and dance and waited my turn. First up was a very informative game show themed presentation. Not bad.

One by one, groups got up, said their peace, and returned to their seats. Nice, informative, but very vanilla. Then it was my turn...lucky #7.

I started with some general introductions, a joke about my twin brother, Brad Pitt (quit laughing!!) then I whipped the crowd into a frenzy with some clapping, pulled out the wig, and sang a little ditty to the theme of the Jefferson's theme song...

"Well, we're movin' on up..."

The crowd roared. Before I hit the high end note, I paused, shamelessly plugged by company one more time (for those of you not in the know, I am contracted to work for these people by an outside company), threw out some frisbees with the company logo on them, and then hit the high note...

"PI.....EYE....EYE...Yeah, yeah!!"

The crowd loved it, even the guy I hit with a frisbee...who actually turned out to be the CIO...whoops!! A few other groups tried to follow, but the crowd was a buzz with what they had just seen.

The vote went overwhelmingly my way, and I won a $200 gift card to the company store. How ironic that the contracted worker gets a gift card to a company store for whom he doesn't work. I looked through the store, and they have lots of great stuff! I am very much looking forward to my shopping spree.

Everyone was very nice, and congratulated me, and told me how energetic and fun the presentation was, which I appreciated. Later, however, when I won a door prize, I got booed..."there's a $200 limit, Tony!!"...

...guess I should have spread the wealth!!

If I Had A Hammer

Unfortunately, I do have a hammer...and now I have a purple thumb to go with it because I suck at using said hammer, and I, repeatedly, hit my thumb instead of the nail.

Roofing sucks.

What else is sore besides my thumb? My back, my shoulders, my legs, my arms...my knees are the size of Texas, with a pain to match...

I shouldn't complain. This long weekend, we decided to re-roof the shed. The roof on the shed consists of a flat carport awning, and a peaked roof for the actual shed. My friend Shannon did the peak opposite of the carport (where if he fell, there is only ground to catch him) and I worked on the flat part and some of the peak on the carport side.

But giving credit where credit is due, the person who did almost all of the peak on the carport side, and half of the flat part, was Becky.

Yes, I made Becky roof the shed with me. Actually, she volunteered, and I, being very afraid of heights, didn't stop her. Boy, you should have seen her shimmy up that peak...actually, I couldn't watch her do it...like I said, I was scared!!

The flat part took about 6 hours, Shannon's peak took about 3, and we finished the other peak in 2 or so. Not too bad, I guess. (I won't count the 3 TRIPS to LOWES!! Why can't I get what I need in one trip?)

What a way to spend a long weekend. Ain't homeownership fun?

Tickle Monster

The other day, while sitting on the couch with Becky, I decided to break into the impromptu "Tickle Monster."

Me: "Here comes the Tickle MONSTER!!" (Yes, I am that sappy.)

Becky: No Reaction

Me: "Ah, Tickle Monster, Tickle Monster."

Becky: No Reaction.

I finally gave up, and sat up with a look of dispair in my eyes.

Becky: "What do you call tickling, when it doesn't tickle?"

Tony: "Besides a mood killer?"

Becky: "No, I'm serious."

Tony: "I guess it's just called, running my fingers across your body."

Becky: Yawn..."Whatever."

The Mother Lode

For those of you who know me, you know that I love records. You know...vinyl. 33 1/3...45 rpm ... records. I am constantly searching for new stuff to add to my ever increasing collection.

Well, last week, I hit the mother lode.

While combing the hundreds-of-thousands of records on EBay, I came across the listing of a guy selling his "entire collection." Usually, this means 50 records or so, scuffed and tore all to hell. Curiousity got the better of me, so I clicked on. The pictures showed a pretty goodly amount of 45 rpm records, some sleeves, etc. I glanced at the description:

Selling my collection of 45 rpm records. Between 10 and 13,000 records.

Did I read that right? 13,000? Yikes!! The opening bid was $1,000...that's darn cheap for 13,000 records. So, I monitored the auction. Days went by.

On the last day, I opened my watch page, and the listing had changed.

100 45 rpm Record Lot

Damn. Too good to be true, I guess. After the bidding produced no buyers, I emailed the guy and asked if he still wanted to sell the lot of 13,000. To my surprise, he did. The catch...his price went up to $1,700.

I was game...Becky was not.

I had to negotiate now with two hostile people. Becky came up with a solution.

"You can buy the records, if I can get a motorcycle." Since Becky is all of 5 foot tall, I was sure she was kidding, so I went about my negotiating tactics with the Record Guy. The only way I would get these records, would be to get him to agree to a low ball offer.

I had to weigh my options carefully. Throw a real low-ball offer at him and potentially piss him off to the point of no return, or semi-low-ball him and potentially piss Becky off to the point of no return...

After carefully weighing the options for 2 seconds, I decided to low-ball him, and potentially kill the deal. $300. I know, it's laughable. I laughed. That's 2 cents per record. What a shame.

I sulked back home and told Becky I low-balled the guy, and the deal was probably dead.

"I guess I can't get that motorcycle then, huh?"

I laughed and said nope...but instead of laughing, she looked sad. Did she really want the bike?

"You weren't serious about the bike were you?"

"Well, yeah!!" Well crap. I just low-balled this guy and now you tell me you really meant it? Damn, I'm really bad at reading women!!

The next day the return e-mail came back. He said no to the $300...go figure. The worse news was he decided to not sell them after all. He didn't want to negotiate.

Deperate times called for desperate measures. I called him. For those of you not in the know, I HATE picking up the telephone to call someone else (getting calls are great, making them suck) but I felt it was my only option.

We talked for awhile, hashed out some terms, and finally decided on a price that was right for both of us. I am not at liberty to discuss the final terms with you, unfortunately, due to the legal implementations (actually, I just don't want to tell you!)

With money in hand, we borrowed Dad's van and travelled down South to Tennessee. Loaded the van down with 83 boxes of 45's, and returned home. After 30 minutes of un-loading boxes, the basement was filled. I had 5 very realistic goals for the lot of records:

1. At least one Chuck Berry 45 on Chess records (I ended up pulling about 7).
2. At least one full box of picture sleeves (I ended up with 9 boxes!!)
3. At least one Buddy Holly on Coral records (several re-issued Buddy Holly...none on Coral)
4. Beatles...Atco...Sweet Georgia Brown (NOPE)
5. I can't remember #5, but it must not have been very important...and I do know it didn't happen.

2 out of 5 may seem bad to you, but I got so much more that I didn't expect. So many mint condition records...not just new records, or junk records...but a lot of older stuff, and actual good stuff, even several boxes of mint promo records! It took 28 hours to look through the lot ONCE!! It was taken a full week of looking just to begin the organizational process, and I have a feeling I will be at this for a very, very long time!! Now, I have to find Becky a motorcycle...

PS...If you have a Sweet Georgia Brown on Atco by the Beatles, please let me know...I will buy it from you!!

The 10 Most Depressing Songs Of All Time

Sometimes, a song is so sad, it make you feel like crying. Sometimes, it's so in your face, it makes you feel uneasy when you hear it. Some songs are so unnerving, they crawl under your skin and die...

Without further ado, I give you:

The 10 Most Depressing Songs of All Time

10. Too Cool For This World - Josh Clayton Felt

--And every time you turn away
All the colors of the day
Reach the sky
Wonder why
You don't see them at all,
When it's only you're reflection
You're passing by...

9. In The Ghetto - Elvis Presley

--As her young man dies,
On a cold and grey Chicago morn',
Another little baby child is born
In the ghetto
And his mama cries

8. Gravedigger - Dave Matthews

--Gravedigger
When you dig my grave
Could you make it shallow
So that I can feel the rain
Gravedigger

7. Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

--Well, I 've been afraid of changing '
Cause I 've built my life around you
But time makes you get bolder
Even children get older
And I 'm getting older, too

6. Raining In Baltimore - Counting Crows

--And I get no answers
And I don 't get no change
It's raining in Baltimore, baby
But everything else is the same

There 's things I remember and things I forget
I miss you I guess that I should
Three thousand five hundred miles away
But what would you change if you could?

5. Girl of the North Country - Bob Dylan

--I 'm a-wonderin ' if she remembers me at all.
Many times I 've often prayed
In the darkness of my night,
In the brightness of my day.

So if you 're travelin ' in the north country fair,
Where the winds hit heavy on the borderline,
Remember me to one who lives there.
She once was a true love of mine.

4. 100 Years - Five For Fighting

--Half time goes by
Suddenly you 're wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We 're moving on...
I 'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

15 there 's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there 's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

3. Space Oddity - David Bowie

--Though I 'm past one hundred thousand miles
I 'm feeling very still
And I think my spaceship knows which way to go
Tell my wife I love her very much she knows
"Ground Control to Major Tom
Your circuit's dead, there's something wrong
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you...."Here am I floating round my tin can
Far above the Moon
Planet Earth is blue
And there's nothing I can do."

2. Mad World - Gary Jules (originally by Tears for Fears)

--All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going no where
Going no where
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very very
Mad world
Mad world

1. Dust In The Wind - Kansas

--I close my eyes, only for a moment, and the moment's gone
All my dreams, pass before my eyes, a curiosity
Dust in the wind,
all they are is dust in the wind.

Same old song, just a drop of water in an endless sea
All we do, crumbles to the ground, though we refuse to see
Dust in the wind,
all we are is dust in the wind

[Now] Don't hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky
It slips away, and all your money won't another minute buy.
Dust in the wind,
all we are is dust in the wind
Dust in the wind,
everything is dust in the wind.

...........................................................

There you have it. The 10 Most Depressing Songs of All Time. Disagree? It's cool. Maybe some Honorable Mentions will help:

Honorable Mentions

Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum (because it's creepy!!)
Angel - Sarah McLachlan
Streets of Philadelphia - Bruce Springsteen
Masters of War - Bob Dylan
Hear You Me - Jimmy Eat World
Hurt - Johnny Cash (and Nine Inch Nails)

Dual Disc = Big Mistake

I recently purchased the new Bruce Springsteen CD entitled "Devils and Dust." I am a Springsteen fan, so this isn't a big surprise. I won't bore you with a track by track review, but I do want to mention a big problem with the disc...

IT WON'T WORK IN MY CAR...ON MY WORK COMPUTER...OR IN MY CD PLAYER.

Oh yeah, you read that right. This CD has the new DualDisc technology, which, for those of you who aren't in the know, means one side of the disc has the CD, and the other side is a DVD which has videos and bonus stuff. It's a good idea...in theory.

Well, the good idea ends there, because I couldn't get the disc to play on anything except my home computer and our laptop. So, I had to burn the CD onto the hard-drive and make a CD from the hard drive, just so I can enjoy the CD at work and in the car.

What a pain in the behind!!

I understand that CD sales are down, and the CD companies feel they need to give you more so you will buy...but honestly, this makes me want to NOT buy Dual Discs and instead make a copy off the internet which is WRONG. I have always perfered the real deal, because I like the artwork, and the satisfaction in having a real copy. But if the real thing doesn't work...

Then what?

People are going to stop buying altogether. I don't think that's what the industry wants. Wake up and fix these crap CD's...before it's too late!!

Why Do You Suck, Detroit Fans? (No, Not All Of Them)

Unless you have been hiding under a rock, you have heard about the Mallice at the Palace...the brawl between the Indiana Pacers and the Detroit Pistons at the Piston's basketball arena, the Palace at Auburn Hills. If not, read all about it here:

Mallice at the Palace

Well, the story doesn't end there. The first meeting between the two teams after this incedent took place at Conseco Fieldhouse in Indianapolis. The game went without a hitch, and everyone finally thought this ugly tale was behind us.

Wrong.

On March 25th, the Pacers returned for the first time to the Palace since the Brawl. They were met with not 1...not 2...not 3...but 4 BOMB THREATS!! The game was postponed for well over an hour to take care of all necessary precautions.

What the hell Detroit fans? Are you kidding me?

The latest episode with the fans happened in the second game of the NBA playoffs between Detroit and the Philadelphia 76ers. Detroit easily defeated Philly in game one, and were well on their way in game two when Detroits fans struck again. This time on Philly's team Captain, Allen Iverson.

With 2 minutes left in the game, a fan hit Iverson with a quarter thrown from the stands. Before you say, it's just a quarter, put one of those bad boys close to your eye and think about the damage a quarter could do if it were to happen to hit you in said eye from a distance. It would mess you up. Of course, it didn't hit Iverson in the eye, but it could have.

The big question here is, Why do Detroit fans suck so bad? Not all of them, but a portion of them. Let's forget about the stupidity of Ron Artest for a second, and let's forget about the arrogance that Iverson displays sometimes...and let's focus on the truth...

Objects are being thrown from the stands.

This is more stupid than Artest going into the stands...it's more arrogant than Iverson on his most arrogant day...

You might say these men are professionals and get paid a lot of money to endure the fans. Nobody makes enough money to be pelted with beer or quarters.

How about the guy in Boston who took a swipe at Gary Sheffield in center field of the Yankees/Red Sox game the other day? The guy took a swipe and hit Sheffield in the mouth...Sheff didn't go into the crowd, but he could have. He could have grabbed that guy and pulled him onto the field and beat the piss out of him, and I think he would have been justified. Does Sheffield make enough money that he should endure being hit in the mouth while doing his job?

No.

I'm tired of hearing the media report these incidents with the emphasis on the player's reactions.

"Sheffield Will Not Be Punished For Reaction."
"Artest To Be Suspended For Season."
"Iverson Reacts How Artest Should Have."

BS. I've played a lot of sports and have had spectators in the stands. Heckling? Fine. Throwing objects? Not fine. Can you imagine basketball or baseball or football with no fans? Or with plexiglass seperating the players and fans like a hockey match? The way things are heading, it will be a reality soon. I can't imagine going to see a basketball game from behind glass. It just isn't right that some fans are ruining it for all the rest of us.

Detroit fans, I'm talking to you.

And the Yankee fans...and the New York Giants fans who pelted San Diego equipment manager Sid Brooks with an ice laced snowball, knocking him unconscious...and the countless other times objects and fans made their way onto the field.

The fans need to grow up...the stadiums need to not worry so much about profits on alcohol sales and more about the players and fans well-being...and the players, well, they need to not worry about being attacked.

Now, tell me how the players can be at fault, when they have to fear for their safety?

It's All The Rage!!

I'm a big supporter of the Lance Armstrong, LiveStrong bracelets that are out there to support Cancer research. I proudly wear one on each wrist, one for my Uncle who beat cancer, and one in rememberence of my grandfather, who passed away with the diesease.

It's unfortunate that this fad has gone as far as it has. I love seeing others with the yellow band on. Becky has a pink one for Breast Cancer...all proceeds go to Breast Cancer research (from Target). But, now you see red, blue, black, rainbow, purple, etc, etc etc...they all mean something, but they can be picked up at gas stations. Do you think they forward the money to AIDS research, to Tsunami victims, or to the other causes? Probably, sadly, no.

There was one I saw today that I think crosses the line...

Beat Bullying



"BEAT" Bullying?!? Beat it? Wow, I think that's the wrong message to get across.

"Mommy, I'm being bullied at school!"
"Here, Timmy, don't beat the bully with your fists, beat them with this bracelet!"
"Thanks mom!! I'll put a big rock in it and crush that mo'fo's head!!"

Wow, wrong message!! At least the bracelet isn't pink!

Super Hero

I am starting to believe, in my advancing age, that I am slowly morphing into a Super Hero. No Super Hero in particular, but more like a mixture of many. Let's examine the facts:

1. Like Spiderman, I have Super Hero senses. I can always tell when it's about to rain because of the aching in my knees. I can always sense when I need to go to the bathroom...usually at least once in the middle of the night.

2. Like Batman, I have a Super Hero ability to sleep for long periods of time. Bats hybernate, don't they?

3. Like Plastic Man, I have Super stretchy skin...in the waist area...allowing maximum weight gain.

4. Like Kojak, I have little hair. What? That could be a super power!! Wait, Kojak isn't a Super Hero? Oh...scratch that.

5. Like Superman, I have the ability to ... well...I could probably change clothes in a phone booth.

Here are some other Super Hero abilities...

---THE ABILITY TO BRUISE LIKE A PEACH.

---THE ABILITY TO LOSE HIS TEMPER ON THE VOLLEYBALL COURT, BY A SINGLE MISSED CALL.

---THE ABILITY TO LIFT HEAVY OBJECTS (I DO HAVE TO LIFT MYSELF OFF THE COUCH, YOU KNOW!!)

AND, MOST IMPORTANTLY...

---THE ABILITY TO DASH CHILDREN'S HOPES AND DREAMS BY TELLING THEM I AM, IN FACT, TOO SORE TO BE THE HORSEY.

Maybe they don't add up to much of a Super Hero, but hey...it's better than The Waffler!! "Gold and crispy, bad guys are histr'y...WAFFLERRRRRRRR!! (Oh you, go rent Mystery Men!!)

I Walk The Line

Last night walked a very fine line between being funny and being down right pathetic. It seems that Becky and I have a "schedule" that is very much set in stone, and must be strictly adhered to...and it revolves around television.

Last night, we went to Franklin to pick up some cookie dough I had bought from my cousin's daughter (I guess that would make her my 2nd cousin or something? anyway...). It was a beautiful day to drop the convertible top and enjoy the ride. But, despite the relaxation that came from the trip, I also knew we had to leave Franklin at 7:00 or before, to make it home in time to get dinner and make it home by 8:00.

We picked up the dough, chatted a bit, and wrapped things up at 6:58...still on schedule. As I was driving into town, trying to pry a dinner idea from Becky, the timeline I had so carefully planned took a hit.

"We need to go to Target."

UGH!! I forgot about Target. She DID tell me that before, but my mind is only a steel trap for useless information, and not for important stuff. So, I rearranged the timeline, pushed down the gas, and pulled into Target at 7:30.

"I'm going in, I only need 7 minutes, I'll be back at 7:37." I told Becky...if I took 7 minutes here, 15 minutes to get food, and 7 minutes to get home...I would make it before 8.

I "hurried" into Target (I don't run, and I'm too fat and sore to jog.) My mission was clear. Toaster Pastries, Laundry Detergent, Dryer sheets, out.

I grabbed the items and picked up speed going to the register, dodging shopping carts and leapfrogging little kids (no, I didn't really leapfrog any little kids...are you laughing? I could do it, you know!!)

I got to the registers and quickly surveyed the cashiers...line's too long...cashier looks slow...cashier is a guy...this one looks good. I made a step towards register 3, but my gut told me to change over to 4.

Good thing I did. As I came to a stop in 4, 3 switched her light on for a price check. I wiped the sweat from my brow and thought to myself...that was a close one.

Lane 4 ended up being the fastest lane in the store, and I got to the car at 7:36, one minute ahead of schedule. We tore over to Wendy's, got our food at 7:45 (7 minutes ahead of schedule) and made it home with plenty of time to kick back, relax, and enjoy American Idol and Amazing Race.

(Editors Note: Did you SEE Amazing Race last night? The one couple took the Fast Forward (skip all taks) and in order to skip all tasks, the chick had to shave her head...and SHE DID IT!! I think she looked pretty good with no hair, actually.)

The pathetic thing is (yeah, like that about isn't pathetic enough) we do this on Monday (shows are on 8-11)...Tuesday (8-11)...Wednesday (American Idol results show, duh!!)...Thursday (8-11)...and Sunday (8-11)...it's sad, but with the summer coming, all the shows will be re-runs, and we can enjoy the summer...until Big Brother comes on!!

A Birthday Trip

I did it!! I survived the year that I was dreading...I am now, officially 28 years old. For those of you not in the know, I have a HUGMONGO problem with the number that sandwiches between 26 and 28. I don't like seeing that number, hearing that number, saying that number...ok, you get the idea. Well, I thought for sure I would have big problems that year, but somehow, I made it out unscathed.

To celebrate, Becky and I decided to take a road trip this past weekend, to celebrate my birthday, her birthday coming up, her new job, etc, etc etc...

So we packed up the Convertible and headed towards the bustling town of Galesburg, Illinois. Never heard of it? Neither did we, until a quick Google search for antiques in Illinois brought us to the town. We drove for 5 hours, got lost once while I was behind the wheel (duh, I always get lost!!) and finally arrived in Galesburg...at about midnight-thirty.

The next day, we hit the Galesburg Antique Mall, a nice three story Mall in which Becky found several Little Golden Books (her vice of choice) and I found a handful of the vinyl records (my vice.) Next, we walked up and down the streets, and found a few closed antique places (BOO) before heading towards a building down a side street that read Collectible - Flea Market. We got halfway there before we realized it said Collectible FIREARMS, not Flea Market. I don't know how we made the mistake either.

We packed up and drove towards our next destination, Kankakee, but Becky stopped at one more place. A real dive looking place called Ziggy's Antique Corporation. I wanted to keep going, but Becky was persistant. I am sooooo glad she was.

Inside, Ziggy's was a virtual record store with some other antiques thrown in. And, no, it wasn't just boxes of junk Musical records...it was the real deal. Among the finds...

George Harrison - All Things Must Pass (3 album set)
Joan Baez - 1st Album, on Vanguard!
2 Beach Boys 45's with Picture Sleeves
A handful of Gene Pitney LP's for $1 each
An even bigger handful of 45's for .25 each
A few Beatles 45's

Ok, I'll stop, I know you probably are saying Gene PitWHO? What does Vanguard mean?

Anyhoo, I dropped a good $70 in there, and came out smelling like roses. If you are in the Galesburg area, I highly recommend Ziggy's on Main Street.

With the top laid back and the high shine shinin', we headed towards Kankakee via 17. It was a really nice 3 hour drive through the small towns and the farming communities. I can tell you, there is more than corn in Indiana, but after this trip to Illinois, I'm not so sure there's much more than that there.

We made it to the 50,000 square foot Kankakee Antique Mall at about 4:40 pm, and they closed at 5. So, we started to bust through the Mall, but found it was too big, so we decided to leave and come back the next day. Becky spent my last $2 cash on a Book, and we left. We drove to Bourbonnais, and grabbed a bite to eat at Ruby Tuesday's. Since the restaurant was in the mall, we decided to walk around when we were finished.

In the back of the mall was a store called Krazy Kollectibles. This place was the bomb!! It had old magazines, music memorabilia, and RECORDS...IN THE MALL!! I couldn't believe it. Of course, the prices were a bit steep. I bought a Lovin' Spoonful 45 with Picture sleeve for $5...I think that was a good deal, but the other stuff...not so much.

We stopped at the Ice Cream shop in the mall, and, since I had no cash, and they didn't take Debit card (who doesn't take Debit card? Even White Castle takes Debit card!!) We asked them if they took an out of State check.

"Um, I don't know..." was the response from the teeny bopper behind the counter. Then silence. Hello, McFly? Are you going to try to find out? Nope. We left. After driving all around the town, we found another ice cream place (unfortunately, it was the same company) but Becky had a 5 in her purse (which she didn't have with her in the mall) and we were able to eat.

We went back to the Antique Mall in Kankakee the next day, and it was a complete bust. 50,000 square feet and I only found 1 record for $2. I took it to the front, slapped it on the counter, and proceeded to pull the Debit card from my wallet...at this point I had no cash.

"Sorry to have to do this to you," I said slidding the card her way. A look of disapointment covered her face.

"Take the album, I'm not running a Master Card for $2!!" Ok, if you say so. I tucked the album and we started to walk out.

"Who doesn't carry cash? What if you wanted to buy a hamburger?" she asked.

I wanted to say:

"Hello, it is 2005 Wilma Flintstone, get out of the cave and join the human race!!"

What I did say was:

"Actually, Debit card is accepted at fast food places now, too."

I smiled, turned and left with my free record in tow. We put the top down, and drove the 4 hours home with the sun on our skin, and the wind in my hairs. Overall, a great trip.